Shove it bully

I was just taking a walk in our society park when this really shy girl from 4th floor came from her coaching class, red cheeks watery eyes and all. So i waved at her, but she just called the lift and went home. i plugged on my i-pod and started walking again, i generally choose the stairs so while going back home i saw her sitting on the stairs,crying. Awkward as i am around wailing strangers, i thought i'd just creep back and use the lift instead
"why do they do this to me all the time?" she said suddenly and i realized my presence hadn't gone unnoticed. So i sat beside her and asked her in a calm soothing tone (i think) "who? what do they do?"
" These girls from class,they always push me around, making fun of my braces, poking me, calling me all sorts of 'fat names' i always help all of them with homework hoping they'd like me but... *choke* *sob* *choke* they don't ever play with me except hide and seek and then they hide and i can never find them...*choke* they never eat with me or call me for sleepovers... *choke over load threat* so i tried to calm her down by asking her if we could be friends. To which she replied with a 'braces special smile' and an enthusiastic nod of the head. So i invited her for a sleepover at my place, i asked her what theme would she like for our little sleepover and she said 'disney' so i said
"great then, get some disney pajamas and meet me at my place at eight" i called her mom and asked for permission. i went home fished out my own mickey mouse t-shirt (yes i have one and a winnie pooh wallet too) went to the market and got some balloons and a small disney chocolate box. We played the whole night, thumb painting, ludo, video games, then make-up man, balloon puppets, little baker what not. While tucking her in bed i told her "people who make you do their homework and then bully you around are never your friends"
"who are friends then?" she asked
after some thought i said "people who make you smile when you're crying"
"that means you" she said and hugged me (my turn to choke, i swallowed) and said
"yes, and from now on just remember one thing a bully only needs a bigger bully, i want you to go to school tomorrow and let them know they can't kick you around like that anymore, you're a strong girl and will fight back"
"yes i will" she said with that indignant face only an eleven year old can make.
"now go to sleep" i said, smiling.
....

The Girl you just called fat?
She has been starving herself & has lost over 30lbs.
The Boy you just called stupid?
He has a learning disability & studies over 4hrs a night.
The Girl you just called ugly?
She spends hours putting makeup on hoping people will like her.
The Boy you just tripped? He is abused enough at home.

There's a lot more to people than you think.

and moreover...what makes you think you're any authority to laugh at someone else anyway?

P.S. You should see her now, she never cries and we often play baddy in the park, she even has a boyfriend "sshssshhhh pinky secret, don't tell mum". :) :)

from the inside

A blank canvas is what i am
and no paint stays for long
happens a splash and colors
but is washed off before it dries
i scare the mirror these days
what am i going to be?
the faith has gone
the shine has frosted
the bubbling energy of youth
has somewhat lost it's fizz
a little too soon
she says I'm going to make
a woman of myself
my head bows down a little more
under the sky of expectations
i'd rather not disappoint
a blank canvas i'm only that
just hope the color stays long enough
this time.

Impatient fingers

Rough hands, dry eyes
hollow echoes of laughter
i had been, i could have been
we had been we could have been
so much more and lesser too
hot bowls of maggie noodles
with onions tossed in butter
you never liked me cooking did you?
"i prefer you raw" you'd said
i used to melt faster than the butter
onions crackling beside the two of us
a drop of oil escapes the pan
searing down my bare back
and the ice you rubbed on the sore
burnt me all the more
"lets just order pizza" damn your impatient fingers
cold marble, hot breath and your impatient fingers.

Bas yun hie

She sat there buttering the buttered toast, finally placing it on his plate. His hand emerged from behind the newspaper picked up the toast and vanished behind it again, she could hear the 'crunch' as he bit into it. He liked his toast just that way put in the toaster with the timer set on 'two'. For breakfast, he had exactly three toasts one buttered two with marmalade she was making and a mug of coffee made with milk powder mixed just before drinking. The coffee powder-his special brand nothing else sugar exactly one teaspoon. She would keep looking at his car till it turned around the corner, out of sight. Lately she had started taking extra care of his comforts, his breakfasts,his laundry,his towels and bedsheets. More often than not when he was not home, she found herself curled up on his side of the bed because it had his scent. More often than not she caught a tear escaping her eye on the sly as she watched him leave for office, just like today.

He got into the car, the driver closed the door behind him got in the car and he was on his way to work, he wondered if she still looked at the car from behind till it was out of sight? but did not turn back to look. Every morning they sat at the breakfast table together, she would make breakfast just the way he liked it, the toasts, the coffee. He even suspected her to have been paying careful attention to his laundry, towels and bedsheets. But could not muster the courage to fold the newspaper and look at her, take her hand in his and kiss it like he so wanted to.
More often than not these days he found himself staring at her face as she slept at night, gently touching the bangles she always wore or brushing aside a strand of hair
from her face. More often than not he caught himself stealing glimpses while pretending to be asleep when she came out of the bath. Her hair loosely playing around her neck, her scent filling the room and his senses. More often than not he found himself staring at her pictures in his lap top while going or coming from work just like right now.

They had had a love marriage, they started in a one bedroom apartment and had promised to work hard and build themselves their dream home. Back then, they would have breakfast together and she would have to push him out of the house so he doesn't get late for work. In the evening, he would come home, heap her in his arms kiss her forehead, they would have dinner together talking about the day, make plans for the future. He would kiss her hand and they would sleep in each others arms. Or he would kiss her hand and that would be the beginning of a wonderful sleepless night. Now many of those plans had taken shape, they lived in a wonderful apartment in one of the most expensive ares of the city, the only constant that remained from their past life were the sleepless nights, only they weren't wonderful anymore. Each lay on his or her side of the bed thinking of the same thing, thinking the other person was asleep, thinking how he missed the other person. Wondering if the other person felt the same. But never knowing, never trying. This had been going on for some time now, their silence had grown into a fragile,insurmountable wall. This went on for some more days.

Then one night something different happened, he came home late as usual, entered the bedroom and found her asleep at his side of the bed, wearing one of his shirts and her shorts, her legs curled together. Normally he would have been upset she spoiled the iron, but he kept his bag on the table, dropped on the floor in front of her. A tear trickled down his eye as he kissed her hand. The familiar long lost sensation woke her up, she saw him there and all at once, the wall crumbled. Her eyes welled. He heaped her in his arms, kissed the palm of her hand, each finger one by one. She was looking at him smiling, not believing he had been there all this while she just had to be on his side. He kissed her eyes, he brushed aside the hair from the nape of her neck, his fingers burning her skin, cupped her face in his hands and at long last their lips met...

the night was sleepless, wonderful.

bas yun hie tumhari yaad agai
bas yun hie hui aarzu,vo adhuri si nazm puri karlu
jo adhi takiyon pe, adhi silavton meh chorh di thi
unhi silvaton meh tumhari sanson ki dhun yaad agai
bhule se baithe thhe ek dusre ki yaad ko
ek chhat ke neeche ghum se gae thhe na?
bas yun hie dil ne kaha kuch baat toh karo
toh baton baton mei tumhari baat yaad agai

Dance - you make me pretty

So after a month long break courtesy exams, I finally got to dance again today,

and it felt amazing, no other word just amazing in every sense of the word, the most overwhelming high. The kind of butterflies no guys has ever given me.

The sight of the stage - dizzying

The pain of the workouts - thrilling

The feel of the music seeping into your senses - drugging

The actual dancing - beyond words

dance you make me pretty. :)